Dear Ambien CR,

I love you. I mean, I REALLY, REALLY love you. You have allowed me to get a good night’s sleep, without the interruption of waking up, tossing and turning, with my thoughts racing at night. Thank you, for letting me recoup and have glorious, uninterrupted sleep for a night…even though you make my body feel drunk right before falling asleep, and also give me the ability to have crazy-ass IM conversation with my boyfriend. Point in case:

Barbie (10:28 PM): ok hn,i took an ambien to help me sleep and i fel lek it s kicking in

M (10:28 PM): I should have taken one too!

Barbie (10:28 PM): well come over

Barbie (10:28 PM): an dtkaae one]’

M (10:29 PM): I’m still sitting up watching the Bears

Barbie (10:29 PM): what qrt

Barbie (10:29 PM): wow

Barbie (10:29 PM): thi cray i feel oiek i['k drunk

M (10:29 PM): just started the 3rd

M (10:29 PM): lol

M (10:29 PM): you're typing like it too

M (10:29 PM): lol

Barbie (10:30 PM): dude hte thigns are moving liek clouds

M (10:30 PM): lol

Barbie (10:30 PM): im tping in clousd

M (10:30 PM): alright baby... you hit the sack and I'll give you the rundown on the bank in the morning

Barbie (10:31 PM): :im typing in CCLSOUDS@]

Barbie (10:31 PM): okkk]]

Barbie (10:31 PM): baarbiiiee go beddby

M (10:31 PM): sweet dreams, doll LMB

Barbie (10:32 PM): you too…i love you my m xoxoxoxoxooxoooooo

Yes. I was “typing in clouds” and clearly making sense. And no, I have not edited anything, that is really the conversation and the way I was typing. I’m so glad my boyfriend loves me. (P.S. “LMB” stands for Love My Barbie, isn’t he great? Yeah.) Anyway. Yes. Thank you again Ambien, for your lovely drunken glorious sleep. You’ve made me fel rejuventaed and ready to take on the day.

All my love,

BB

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Dear Kind Souls at Wilson Farms,

Since moving ot Boston, it’s not often that I have run across people, who in short, act more like Midwesterners when it comes to helping people in need. But let me tell you folks, you not only restored my faith in people, but faith in Northeasterns as well. I’d like to thank you, Michelle, that kind woman, who while stranded in the snowstorm last Thursday, and my car RAN OUT OF GAS because it took me FOUR HOURS to go 3 miles on a 1/4 tank of gas, form the bottom of my heart. I’d like to thank you for calming me down, wiping my tears away, and driving me to the nearest gas station to fill up a container of gas. Then, when we couldn’t find one, and finally bullied the cashier whom was not an English speaking person to let me borrow one, and you took and filled up the container with your debit card, you truly became my hero. By the way, I really loved your Black SAAB SUV. I hope to own one, some day. Your kindness and generosity have stayed with me- especially when you also gave me your ice pick and car brush to sweep off the accumulating snow and ice on my car, when mine snapped in half under your watch. You are truly an angel.

And to you, Mr. Snowplow Man working for Wilson Farms, you? Are also an angel. Thank you, for rescuing me from my car and not knowing how to actually transfer the container of gas to my actual gas tank. And not laughing at me in the process. Even when I asked if there was going to be enough gas to get me where i needed to be. Thank you for stifling your laugh, and saying, “follow me little lady, we have a gas pump over at the Farm” where you then promptly filled up my ENTIRE gas tank, and said “Merry Christmas, just get home safe.” I didn’t mean to scare you when I attacked you with a hug and was crying…I was just so moved by your generosity. You really made an impression, and for that, I will pay it forward, and never forget the kindness you showed.

With Love,

Snow Stranded Barbie

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Dear Edgar,

Merry Christmas little buddy. I’d like to thank you for being the reason I got a text message from Hot Neighbor this past weekend, letting me know that I have “Crazy mouse living in your apt!” To which I responded: “I see you’ve met Edgar. Yes he is insane.” I look forward to when HotNeighbor moves in February 1st (oh yes folks, lots to update you on the roomie front, but all is well good and fine and all parties are happy with this choice, including M and HotNeighbor’s girlfriend) and gets to be the one to deal with you. Because frankly? Yeah. I’m jsut going ot pretend you don’t exist until I see you scurry about at which point I will yell for hot neighbor to dispose of you. Until then, enjoy the holidays, little buddy. Don’t ever say that I’m not showing any Christmas spirit.

Always,

B

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Dear Sugar Free Cinnamon Dolce Latte, Skim No Whip,

I love you. I love you in your big cup of wintry warm goodness. I love your cute little holiday starbucks cup so much so that I was forced to buy the ceramic version. I know, I know. Not practical. But you know what? You’re just so damn cute and you bring me such happiness that I’m just going to have to deal with my depleting bank account made from non practical purchases such as these. So thank you, because you really do give my days an uplifting start.

Holiday cheer to you and yours,

BB

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