That’s what I’m declaring on my personal life. To say that lots has been happening round these parts would be an understatement. But today? I can say that inventory is almost complete.

No more greekman.No more teddybear. No more multiples of men tossing back and forth in and out of the woodwork.

Its true. I have commitment issues.I’m so afraid of actually having something that works and is real, I go after relationships that are completely wrong-in SOME way shape or form for me-to keep my heart safe.

So in addressing those? I’m thinking itd be best to just focus on one at a time.

The dates and dinners and flowers and filled social calendars are nice, but I’m tired.

Exhausted, really.

I start my ICU rotations on monday…that said, its time to grow up.Its high time I put my personal goals and needs in the ICU, and focus on the future I want to be possible…and stop playing around with not only my heart, but others.

Here’s to a new shift starting.Nurse Barbie is on the clock…with her heart and future on the monitor.

God willing,let’s hope it doesn’t flatline.

Oh hai. Barbie here. And now? Now I’m officially on my way towards late twenties. I’m 26 today.

It’s been a year, folks; those of you faithful followers know this to be true. I entered and exited my quarterlife crisis with grandeur, to say the least. I said good bye, and then came crawling back to blogging.

I loved and laughed; I cried with heartbreak. But alas, I’ve crossed over to the other side, and I’m smiling in the sun. But that just might be the crystal light pink lemonade and vodka talking in the hot summer sun. We’ll never know.

But I digress.

So without further ado, I’ll continue on the series of birthday posts which I began two years ago…what 365 days of being 25 has taught me:

/………..

25. At the end of the day, everyone is only looking out for themselves. It may hurt to realize that, but that means YOU need to look out for YOU. Otherwise you will be eaten alive. That said, never allow that to make you become cold….frozen to the human connection. Delicate. Balance.

24. Sweet sister mercy I really can cook. And that means not just perfecting my recipes, but making up new ones in the kitchen. Finally.

23.  Time heals all wounds. That includes my past with M, and with every day that passes, my history with Ken. One step at a time. No looking back.

22. I have never been happier with my career choice as when I’m in my scrubs, on the floor, tending to patients.

21. Everyone should be a waitress once in their life. It will humble you.

20. My father isn’t as off his rocker as I thought he was. Just really wobbly. But, I can sometimes relate to that wobbly. I take this as a hopeful sign.

19. My puppy will always love me, even if i have to go away for lengths at a time. he knows who his mamma is. I look forward to the day NEXT august when we’ll be reunited for good.

18. I hate deli meat. After putting up with it through all the years; honey chipped ham, oven roasted turkey, roast beef, blahblahblah, it makes my stomach and nose curl at the thought of it. Deli meat? It’s over. I’m sorry. It’s not you, its me.

17. I am turning into my mother. I looked down at my outfit the other day, and my accessories included wearing a long gold chain with a coin on it, and gold loop earrings. Mini mi madre.

16. I’ve realized that a brief encounter in your life really CAN turn into a lifelong relationship; as evidenced by this exchanges:

“in the meantime…happy early birthday…you know i love ya (in that former student-teacher student almost sort of girlfriend, eternally bonded in some way or another friend/sweetheart for life kind of way)”

I know. I never said my life made sense. He’s married with two beautiful little girls. and adores them. he is an all-around good man. i just seem to have a gift for having crazy ass relationships with different types of people in my life.

15. $ is my frenemy.

14. Joshua Radin’s lyrics and notes make him a musical god.

13. It’s really starting to bother me the ridiculous amount of engagement, marriages, and baby arrivals are happening to people in my life right now. Everyone else is there, but I’m not…..right now. I will be though, someday.

12. Drinking copious amounts of wine will STILL guarantee you feel like ASS the next day, and vomming every 20 minutes. For 7 hours straight.

11. Good thing you’ve learned to prepare for this situation and have ample supplies of cool blue gatorade, and warmed flour tortillas to help the hangover.

10. Dating younger men is FUN. Until you fall for them. Then, that really sucks. Because what might be the perfect relationship will never be, thanks to life timing and circumstances.

9. Men in my life like to come out of the woodwork at the most random of times.

8. I need/like my alone time. I’m a people person, but only when I want to be. I really don’t mind being alone. And I take that as a good thing.

7. Ambien can make you say/do/write crazy ass shit. That you won’t remember.

6. I really love my grandma.

5. But hate seeing the emotional strain she has put on my mother.

4. But I know that I will be the same way with my mother, no matter what.

3. Losing purse(s) is not fun. Canceling cards, ordering new ones, and missing your beloved satchels = NOT ok. Especially when they contain items special to you such as: Tiffany’s bracelets. chanel lipgloss, iPods, etc. Epic responsibility fail.

2. Be thankful for your best girlfriends. Because they will be the ones who pick you up off the floor and hold you while you are sobbing and convulsing. Whether it be because of heartbreak, death or just a breakdown. They will be there for you, even if only for a needed embrace and reassuring hairstrokes. (Yes, this has been on the list every single year, but it has been reinforced, every. single. year.)

1. you will recognize your own personal strength and growth, every. single. day. Although the trials and tribulations in this past year have aged me 10yrs rather than 1, I’m still here. And I’m still smiling. And that, my friends, is a lot.

There’s still a lot to look forward to, 26. Taking the NCLEX, figuring out where my next move is….who knows, maybe I’ll meet (and/or) realize the man I’m going to marry at 26. You never know….but I do know that I would not still be standing as strong as I am today without my friends, family, and the most amazing people I’ve met through this blogging world.

To new beginnings.

/……

Oh, and  you thought I’d get away without being all ME! ME! ME! on my birthday? HA. I SCOFF at you. Do you know what I want my birthday present to be from y’all?

Delurk yourselves!

And comment, damnit. You have no idea how much reading your comments means to me. And besides, I AM the birthday girl

xoxo, bb

**Editor’s Note: So, I got really mad when I didn’t hear from ANYONE after posting this beauty. PSHAW. How COULD you freaders??!! And then, I realized…BB, you? Are a dumbass. Why? Because I never POSTED said post. Clearly, I’m awesome like that. So, uh, enjoy yesterday’s post.  Also….updates on StarbucksMan. We’ve hung out twice, since meeting. True story. (That’s how I roll.) Catch ya on the flipside, I have a test to study for. BAH.**

Things of note, a la bullet point style that I have made famous. (Or so I like to pretend.):

• I had a kickass time in clinical rotations this past week. Definitely solidified I LOVE what I’m doing so much more (x 97bajillion times) than what I was doing before.

• Am stressed for Exam on Monday. Hence going out tonight and drinking copious amounts of wine to relieve stress. Hoping it will not deter my studying patterns all day tomorrow.

• Met cute man at Starbucks today whilst studying. Seriously, these things still happen. After smiling back and forth at each other throughout the afternoon, homeboy came up to me as he was leaving. Whilst handing me a notecard with his name and number on it, he said “I don’t mean to interrupt you, but hi, I’m StarbucksGuy. Here’s my number if you ever would like a study partner.” (Internal Monologue: HOLY SHIT! THIS IS AWESOME! Guys still do this??? Props to him for having the balls to do so! This is cool! And he’s cute! Done and done! Goooood work BB.) We might be meeting up for a drink or after our already similar plans of dinner and drinks with friends (like he said, “I’ll get a hold of you if ‘drinks’ don’t turn into ’shots.’ I have to study all day tomorrow too…”. So far, this shows promise.

• Had 2nd date with boy I spoke about last week. Went well, apparently our 3rd date is on the horizon, which is kinda  a funny story being that I haven’t really been making much effort toward keeping in touch with him as I have other thing on my mind (i.e.: school, school, drinking, and school. Duh.); definitely won him over with my chix parm & homemade sauce. True story. Although, note to friends: do not take Ambien and then reply to texts messages. You WILL think it necessary to volunteer to “whip something up” after a 9 hr shift on the floor, as opposed to ordering in and picking up a bottle of wine. Because apaprently, I think I am Betty F*cking Crocker. Proof that drugs alter your common sense. Drugs are good bad. M’kay?

• After finally watching the movie Slumdog Millionaire (OMG LOVED. LOVED. LOVED.) I have subsequently developed a crush on an Indian medical student that has rotations on the same floor I do. Because clearly, this makes sense. So far we’ve exchanged “hi, how are you’s” and smiles. Definitely on the fast track to busting out the beautiful sari’s for our wedding day.

• Try as I may, I’m really trying to forget about Teddybear. Because despite the fact we connect on ALL LEVELS and are so wonderful together, the fact remains nothing is going to happen in the immediate future and I just need to get over that fact. Hence the reason for listening to Ingrid Michaelson’s new song “Maybe” on repeat. AMAZING SONG. AMAZING artist.

• Speaking of, anyone in the Philly area want to go see her in concert with me in September? Inquire within. Kthx.

• Not really sure why this post managed to go off on a boy tangent, but oh wells. Think that’s my cue to just end this post now while I’m ahead, and this large glass of red wine is still intact.

Peace out and catch ya on the flip side, bitches.

xo, bb

I love my amazing friends. I really, truly do. I pretty much think that I’m the luckiest girl in the whole, wide, world to have such an eclectic group of phenomenal people in my life. But you know what, folks? Being 25, on the brink of 26, is a mighty funny age and time in your life.

It is so, unbelievably, completely polarizing.

In fact, I feel as if there are two sides of the fence. The married and wanting babies side, and the single going out with your girls side having cute boys buy you drinks so you don’t have to pay for them.

Everyone is different; they have different choices, different paths, all that jazz blahblahblah we’re taught. And I get it. I do. I also know not to compare myself to others, because everyone is on their own timeline.

But do you ever just feel caught in the middle?

On one hand, I see an adorable baby and can totally relate to my married friends who have babies on the brain, and are so content to stay at home on a Saturday night with the significant other. Hell, if I had a boyfriend, or man, I think that’d be great! I mean, I love my Manolos just as much as the next girl, but give me sweatpants and curling up with my man watching a movie? Done and done.

On the other, I don’t realllly have a manfriend, am living the “college life” albeit graduate as opposed to undergrad, and damnit on a Saturday night after studying my assss off all week I just want to let loose and flirt with band members, drink tequila shots, and wear questionably short skirts, all the while laughing with my fellow single girls.

But at what point- crossing that great divide constantly- do you find yourself in no man’s land and enough is enough?

I’m at a point now, where I’m the happiest I’ve been in a long time. I’m also at a point where despite that, I still feel guilty for CONSTANTLY comparing myself to both sides. And also, for feeling resentment at both sides. Not toward the people; heavens no…just that they have somewhere to belong. They don’t find themselves questioning one day “WHY AM I NOT MARRIED AND WANTING A BUNDLE OF JOY?!” to the next, realizing “OH SHIT, I TOTALLY FORGOT TO WATER MY HOUSEPLANT BECAUSE I WAS SO HUNGOVER AND TIRED FROM MY WEEKEND OF STUDYING/PARTYING.”

Going from zero to sixty and back again is exhausting. I haven’t come to a conclusion, and I don’t know if I ever will.

I do think, though, that it’s okay to feel the tug of both sides. Because really, everyday we discover something new about ourselves.

Like, today for instance. I discovered the taste of horseradish sauce. And how it makes me want to vomit and invades my nostrils and the sickening stench WILL NOT LEAVE MY NASAL CAVITIES.

These discoveries are important stuff people.

So,teaching point: while some discoveries we make, we will find ourselves never going back on. (Read: eating horseradish sauce ever, ever, EVER again.) And others? Well, I guess we’ll just have to walk the line for a bit till we fall on one side permanently, and just enjoy the time in between.

hi. we’re speaking in short sentences today. yesterday I was going to write about Greekman. But that didn’t happen. yesterday, lots of things did happen though. my parents were screaming at each other. My grandma defecated all over herself and the bed, and it took me hours to clean up. she also fell out of bed in the middle of the night, and was very, very scared. then, when that part of the day was over with, after I had my two classes I found out I have an exam tomorrow in anatomy&physiology. and after dinner? tompettyboyfriend called me. and for lack of better terminology, broke up with me. no, i dont want to talk about it. yes, i’m fine. i’m really tired. exhausted really. i dont have the effort to put forth the analyzing of anything. because my brain hurts. lotsly. after that, i had to take a molecular cell biology 10 pt. quiz. which i failed. but then, this morning, the professor admitted to having messed up on some answers, and gave everyone perfect 10 out of 10s. i got my hair highlited this afternoon and now i’m blond. pretty blond. i feel pretty. even though my insides feel pretty shitty. hey, that rhymed. i called off of work tonight. and i will be studying for the rest of evening. that, and admiring my pretty blond hair in the mirror. while silently listening to music bemoaning the fact that everyone, including men i date can say i’m the entire package, smart, beautiful, funny, charming, etc, etc, yet its never enough. i’m tired of thinking. i want a very strong martini. and to hang out with my girlfriends on outdoor patios and drink said martinis. i’m nervous about figuring out this whole loan thing. anymore, i feel numb to everything.  planning my move is very trying and stressful. on me and my family. i’m going to miss my puppy. i also want colbyjack cheese cubes right now. the end.

Helllllo out there!

Anybody there?!

Hopefully so. I know I’ve been slacking off and not writing a lot lately, and my readership has dwindled considerably. So if those of you who are still out there and are reading? Thank you. A lot has been happening in my life…and lately, I feel like my REAL life is just so much to take, that the thought of sitting down and writing about it and analyzing it over my Internet life was just exhausting. So I took a little time.

And here’s what happened.

I’ve been finding myself walking around, everywhere I go posing Carrie Bradshaw like questions to everything I see. Offering my own internal take on relationships, life, and/or lack thereof. And that’s when it hit me. Holy Hell, Batman, I need to write.

Brilliant observation, I know.

My fingers need to draw themselves over the keyboard typing up a tapestry of my daily thoughts. My mind won’t ever be settled until I deal with whats going on, and put it out there. And so, back to the laptop I trail, with my head hanging low, fighting every urge in my body to not put everything out there- to keep it locked up inside, so I don’t have to come to terms with the thousands of things that cross my mind.

But that’s not healthy. And we’re on a quest for healthy and happiness here, folks.

I was reading a totally awesome lady, and she spoke of a quote she came across in a magazine. Drew Barrymore said:

“Here’s something else I will happily share, something a friend told me that changed my world, though it didn’t necessarily change my behavior. And it’s this: Men build bridges. If they want to find your phone number or anything else, they will. They will build huge, massive bridges to get to you.”

And it just hit me. Today, all of a sudden.

I need to stop making things more complicated than they need to be. I need to stop worrying so much about what’s going to happen, that I miss out on the simple wonderfuls of now. And that goes for not only life, but my relationships as well.

I need to make bridges for myself whilst waiting for others to build some connecting to me. Because only then, will I have a complete highway system to ride up and down the highway of life on.

As for school, I’ve been so stressed out with my classes, and in particular, an arrogant prick for a professor. But at the end of the day, what is the reason for the stress? I know I will pass the class. I know I won’t be getting an A+…something hard to digest for my overachiever self. But you know what? Sometimes, the best you can do isn’t always going to be an A+.

AND THAT’S OKAY.

Let me repeat, THAT IS OKAY.

(Sometimes I have to repeat that mantra over and over so it will sink into my sometimes thick skull.)

In regards to relationships, Greekman has resurfaced as he just doesn’t ever really go away, in a manner of speaking, basically made it clear he wants to marry me, but nothing will happen until I’m done with school, so he’s just not going to make a decision until he has to. (Whatever….who said i wanted to be with YOU anyway?! Seriously?! Seriously!)

And TomPettyBF? Heart. Heart him. REALLY WANT THINGS TO WORK OUT WITH HIM, and for the record, I already view him as my “manfriend,” But, also, we’re in a limbo of sorts. I’m not in the same city yet, (although I will be in a month and a half), and there’s really nothing that’s going to change right now, so I need to just get through this period of limbo and focus on the THINGS THAT I CAN CONTROL. And then of course, there’s the worry that once I do get out there it will turn into a miserable trainwreck and just be bad and that aside set of hopes will be crushed, so that is why I’m focusing on myself and school and welcome to my crazymind hello nice to meet you.

(For the record, both are Libras, and birthday are six days apart. Coincidence?! I THINK NOT.)

Ahem. Deep breaths.

Let me reiterate (another thing, yes): FOCUS ON THE THINGS YOU CAN CONTROL, OTHERWISE YOU WILLLL DRIVE YOURSELF CRAZY.

Note to self: heed own aforementioned advice.

So yes, manfriend is still there, but it’s a limbo period….just like now, in waiting for school to start…and waiting to hear about potential apartments….and waiting, and waiting…..

And waiting some more. Please do not think this is idle waiting, however.

Far from it.

In fact, I think that during this period of waiting, I’ll have gathered up enough pebbles to start to build my own bridges to things that are good for ME.

MY career. MY friendships. MY family. MY new path in life.

I may not be all together, all of the time, but I’m getting there. Slowly but surely, pebble by pebble, I will build bridges important to me, with hardwork, sacrifice, and love- of others and myself-as its foundation.

And maybe, someday….someone will build an exit ramp, or even a huge, massive bridge to connect with me on my stretch of the highway.

Today, I celebrate my half-birthday.

(Shush. No haters.)

I am officially 25 1/2.

*insert confetti throwing here.*

I probably should back up and state this tradition came about due to the fact my birthday is in the summer, and no one was ever around in the beginning of August (college, high school. etc.). And because everyone likes to feel special, I institued the half birthday celebration. Basically because I like people to pay attention to me and buy me pretty things. Which no one actually does, but I can hope one day that idea will come true. Wait, did I just say that out loud?

Ahem.

So far, it’s been a good year, despite the ups and downs. So if you excuse me, I may just go drink a mimosa in celebration.

Of myself.

And my fabulousness.

So, I leave you with this: does anybody else out there celebrate or at least recognize their half birthday? If so, you totally should. Because who doesn’t like having TWO DAYS a year designated to them?

No one. That’s who.

Why is it, that when one part of your life is going so well, the other parts fall to pieces?

Today? I feel like an epic failure at life.

Note to self: have fireside chat with mother nature re: the number of hours in the day. And how to incorporate more of them, in regards to even attempting to meet the high expectations I set for myself.

In the meantime, I’m going to go bury my head under the covers. Kthxbai.

Today is Christmas day, night. As I sit here, I’m listening to my emo mix and sipping on some red wine, and thinking about not only this holiday season, but rather the past few…so forgive me if this is a cathartic tipsy rambling and it’s not all happiness and merriment and pretty packages with bows.

I know that I’m very blessed. I am healthy, have a loving supporting family and strong circle of friends. I am smart, I have a good disposition (most of the time), and appear to be a (somewhat) functioning normal adult.

But at what point is enough?

I drove to an Xmas Eve gathering last night, one I’ve been going to for the past 6 or so years. It’s a small gathering, and consists of all of us standing in a kitchen, drinking down bottles of champagna, and eating delicious dips and xmas cookies that were given as gifts. I am usually the only girl, with the exception of a fiance, or perhaps wife. There is never more than 10 of us. These boys are like brothers to me. We have a history of love, life and laughter. The one that got away happened to be present at last night’s gathering, sans wife, and somehow, it was good. We laughed, we talked, and reminisced.  Like old friends do.

As friends, all strangely connected, we make up our dysfunctional family- and this tradition- is one of my favorites this time of the year.

There is a manger scene with a wise men that has been decapitated and fixed courtesy of super glue (3 Christmas Eve’s ago, I was drunk, and swung my coat around. Poor dude and his Myrrh took a bad hit.) And there is the smell of cigarette smoke in the air, as the air filter on the stove is tired from working so many parties before. There are the poinsettias, and the stark whiteness of a bachelor pad’s kitchen. My friend’s single father drunkenly keeping the glasses topped off, striving to stay young. He’s passed that milestone years ago.

But he’s family.

I drove there last night and as my cheery x-mas cd played through, I found myself changing the channel. Somehow, the somber, harmonica ridden melody of Ryan Adams’ “Come Pick Me Up,” better fit my mood.

Hands on the steering wheel, I realized that I’m not happy.

But, I’m not unhappy, either.

It’s like I’m kinda just (once again) standing somewhere in between, going through the motions.

It’s not all bad, and I don’t mean to be debbie downer….

I AM really proud of myself- my grades- my acceptance to Nursing Schools (3 for 3, so far), the way I’ve been able to spend time with and help out my family….

But something, something is missing.

And as much as I don’t want to admit that, when the holiday season rolls around, I can’t help but look at the glimmer of the tree, and the sparkle of champagne glasses, and gaze at the mistletoe. I see couples holding hands, walking in the snow.

And then it hits me….I want to feel the excitement of something new.

Something real.

Sure, there are prospects, but for now, that’s what they remain….prospects.

I want to fall asleep next to someone. I want to bake cookies to cheer someone up when they’re having a bad day. I want to sip coffee on Sunday mornings, and have them help me with the crossword.

I realized a few days ago that I’m the only one of my high school and college friends, combined, that is not married, or not in a serious relationship. While I’m worried about loans and studying for finals, they’re worrying about buying a house, or picking out rings.

And it will come someday, hopefully.

But right now, I’m frustrated and tired of being patient.

I feel so alone.

I don’t want to have to snap at my mother “just. stay. out of it.” and walk out of the room in frustration.

(For the record, she keeps pushing Greekman, and me to “not burn my bridges.”

Sample convo:

BB: Why is that he can screw me over, six ways from Sunday, and you KEEP pushing the idea of him on me? You always defend him and expect me to just let him treat me this way?! I DON’T get it.

Mi Madre: BB, I’m not, I’m just saying not to burn your bridges. He’s not ready, that’s all.

BB: Exactly. Which he’s communicated to me. So excuse me, if I’m not going to keep let him jacking me around and be at his beckon call. No.

Mi Madre: BB, I’m only trying to help…

BB: DO you know how you can help? Just. Stay. Out of it. *storms off*

….Aaaaaaaand end scene.)

***

I’m tired.

I’m alone.

And I don’t want to be, anymore.

But somehow, i just don’t think that’s int eh cards for me right now…..which just makes the ache hurt even more.

But it’s Christmas. And I’m sorry I couldn’t speak of happier things. I really am. But, it’s Christmas. And you tell the truth on Christmas.

I want to be perfect to someone. Just one person….in all my imperfections.

And that, is the truth.

Maybe I just need to stop watching Love Actually, and drinking red wine.

Le Sigh. Happy holidays, all.

xoxo, BB

I really need to start off by saying how much y’all ROCK.

No, really. I was blown away. BLOWN AWAY by the amount of comments and emails and suggestions I received. Seriously? Y’all are bitchin’. TOTALLY. BITCHIN’. And for those of you that are new around these parts, you should know that is pretty much the HIGHEST BARBIE COMPLIMENT EVER.

Ever.

So, really? Y’all deserve a bajillion gold stars. Because you’ve kept me sane these past couple days. And like I told our darling Clinky the other day: “I’m really appreciative, because I’m pretty sure those shades of gowns worn at the funny farm would do absolutely nothing to compliment my skin tone.”

Classic.

So while there is all of this awesomeness going on, there is however, one tiny downfall. Minor detail. And that, would be status of my AmEx. Which is currently quivering in a corner, begging for lube, because oh. It’s been abused. ABUSED these past two days, partypeople. ITunes has assraped my Amex. It’s cool. Apple is currently

And just when I finally paid all of my cards off. I know. Currently officially out of debt as of 9.20.08, actually. (That was a great day.) (Not quite sure why it was not celebrated on ‘zee blog.) (Maybe because I was too busy writing in parentheticals.)

But now, we’re back to the red. Because my music addiction habit is an expensive one….even at 99cents a pop. That shit adds up, yo.

But we won’t think about that.

What we will think about, though? Glad you asked. My fabulous new selection of songs compiling the new playlist, so appropriately entitled “life,lemons&vodka.” (Think about it.)

So, another big thanks for all of the suggestions. You guys never cease to amaze me. And because I’m in a giving mood, I’m going to share with you some lyrics that have been floating around in my head, thanks to the new playlist, life,lemons&vodka. (Again, think about it. I so clever.)

So, happy humpday folks, and feel free to help out the state of Apple stock in this economic crisis like I did. iLove, bitches. iLove.

/…….

***Barbie PSA: This part is long. Feel free to skip. I’m currently in a state of CabSauv Buzz. Which really means I’m skipping through my playlist blaring out these parts of song as I type. What, like you don’t do it too?  Feel free to dissect a piece of wisdom out of the many lyrics I’m about to put before you, if you stay with me. If not, pizzzeeeaaccccceee.***

**Edited to reflect I’m a lot more tipsy than I so thought. And there’s seriosuly like 50 songs down there. Jebus. Aaaaaand comments from yours truly. Clearly, this makes me awesome.**

Shawn Mullins: Beautiful Wreck

“At the dark end of this bar
What a beautiful wreck you are
When you go too far,
Beautiful wreck you are
What a beautiful, such a beautiful
A beautiful wreck you are
What a beautiful, such a beautiful wreck”

Ingird Michaelson: Be OK

Open me up and you will see
I’m a gallery of broken hearts
I’m beyond repair, let me be
And give me back my broken parts

I just want to know today, know today, know today
I just want to know something today
I just want to know today, know today, know today
Know that maybe I will be ok

P!nk: So What

So, so what?
I’m still a rock star
I got my rock moves
And I don’t need you
And guess what
I’m having more fun
And now that we’re done
I’m gonna show you tonight
I’m alright, I’m just fine
And you’re a tool
So, so what?
I am a rockstar
I got my rock moves
And I don’t want you tonight

Christina Aguilera: Keeps Gettin’ Better

Step back gonna come at ya fast
I’m driving out of control
And getting ready to crash
Won’t stop shaking up what I can
I serve it up in a shot
So suck it down like a man
So baby yes I know what I am
And no I don’t give a damn
And you’ll be loving it

Some days I’m a super bitch
Up to my old tricks
But it won’t last forever
Next day I’m your super girl
Out to save the world
And it keeps gettin’ better

Corrine Bailey Rae: Put Your Records On

Maybe sometimes, we’ve got it wrong, but it’s alright
The more things seem to change, the more they stay the same
Oh, don’t you hesitate.

Girl, put your records on, tell me your favourite song
You go ahead, let your hair down
Sapphire and faded jeans, I hope you get your dreams,
Just go ahead, let your hair down.

You’re gonna find yourself somewhere, somehow.

Cake’s Version of: I Will Survive

(Love me some Gloria G, but Cake’s version is just so much more…..F*ck You.)

Oh now go,
Walk out the door
Just turn around now
You’re not welcome anymore
Weren’t you the one who tried to break me with desire
Did you think I’d crumble
Did you think I’d lay down and die
Oh no, not I
I will survive
As long as I know how to love I know I’ll be alive
I’ve got all my life to live
I’ve got all my love to give
I will survive
I will survive
Yeah, yeah

Christina Ag (AGAIN): Fighter

(You sing it girlfriend. YOU ARE A FIGHTER!)

After all you put me through
You’d think I’d despise you
But in the end I wanna thank you
‘Cause you made me that much stronger

Well I, thought I knew you
Thinking, that you were true
Guess I, I couldn’t trust
Called your bluff, time is up
‘Cause I’ve had enough

…..

Makes me that much stronger
Makes me work a little bit harder
It makes me that much wiser
So thanks for making me a fighter
Made me learn a little bit faster
Made my skin a little bit thicker
Makes me that much smarter
So thanks for making me a fighter

Faith Hill: Free

Life pulls fast changes
Wind blows past pages
All I see is I don’t need this
High strung tightrope walk
Ticking time bomb clock
Scratch my name off
Cut these chains

I’m free…kicking out of that prison
I’m am free…singing those words of wisdom
Let it be…nobody gonna put the blues inside of me

Madonna: Sorry

I don’t wanna hear, I don’t wanna know
Please don’t say you’re sorry
(Don’t explain yourself cause talk is cheap)
I’ve heard it all before, And I can take care of myself
(There’s more important things than hearing you speak)
I don’t wanna hear, I don’t wanna know
Please don’t say ‘forgive me’

Maria Mena: Fragile

(I AMMMMM fraaaagilllllleeeee I ammmmmm hopelessssssss)

I’ve been walking around all day,
Laughing.
I think I’d be better off without you here.
And I bet you’re sweet and hard to get over.
So I’ll cry and people will stop and stare.
Now that’s okay.
Let them stop and stare.

Cause I am fragile.
I am hopeless.
I’m not perfect.
But I am free.

Jo Dee Messina: Not Goin Down

(SHe is the BEES KNEES. omfg. Did I jstu say BEESKNEES? omg, i did. seriosuly though. sing it woman.)

Been burned by the fire
Been stuck under water
Strung up on a wire and still the world goes around
Been tossed like a free throw
Knocked out when the wind blows
Pull the curtain on the hurtin’
‘Cause I’m not going down
(I’m not going down no no)

Kanye West: Stronger

too drunk to find lyrics. you know this song. jamz. out.

Lily Allen: Everything’s Just Wonderful

Do you think, everything, everyone, is going mental,
It seems to me that it’s spiralling outta control and it’s inevitable,
Now don’t you think,
This time is yours, this time is mine,
Its temperamental,
It seems to me, we’re on all fours,
Crawling on our knees,
Someone help us please

Oh Jesus Christ almighty,
Do I feel alright? No not slightly,
I wanna get a flat I know I can’t afford it,
It’s just the bureaucrats who won’t give me a mortgage,
Well it’s very funny cos I got your xxxxxx money,
And I’m never gonna get it just because of my bad credit
Oh well I guess I mustn’t grumble,
I suppose that’s just the way the cookie crumbles.

Rosie THomas: Wedding Day

so much for love
i guess i’ve been wrong
but it’s all right cuz i’m moving on
i’m gonna drive over hills
over mountains and canyons

and boys that keep bringin me down
i’m gonna drive under skyline and sunshine
drink good wine in vineyards
and get asked to dance
i’m gonna be carefree and let nothing pass me by
never ever again

it’s gonna be so grand
it’s gonna be just like my wedding day

What Made Milwaukee Famous: Sultan

I’ve had less than my fair share of lucky breaks
And enough of this fooling around
I’ve got one last chance to get rid of my past
And bury it deep in the ground
And no matter what you try man
You’re never gonna tear me down

When the only blame you cast is your own
And your only guarantee is your fear of the unknown
If you don’t cut your losses before you get lost
They’re never going to leave you alone

My best bits of advice I’ll repeat only twice
After that you can fend for yourself
If you think that your shoes couldn’t find better use
About just about anyone else

You need to face up and fold
Or deal with the hand you’re dealt

Make up your mind
Are you in are you out
I’ve no patience for your impetuous doubt

What is Mine: O.A.R.

Been to the black rock
Found my salvation
Rendered me patient
But wearing me thin
So I’m

On the way back home
Seen the big show, thousand times
Got to get back what is mine
The only way I know
Feet been walking, thousand miles
Got to get back what is mine

What is mine

Jack’s Mannequin: Swim

(IIII beeeee swimmmmin)

You gotta swim
Swim for your life
Swim for the music
That saves you
When you’re not so
sure you’ll survive
You gotta swim
Swim when it hurts
The whole world is watching
You haven’t come this far
To fall off the earth
The current will pull you
Away from your love
Just keep your head above

Kate Voegele: It’s Only Life

Tears are forming in your eyes
A storm is warning in the sky

The end of the world it seems
You bend down and you fall on your knees
Well get back on your feet yeah

Don’t look away
Don’t run away
Hey baby it’s only life
Don’t lose your faith
Don’t run away
Hey baby its only life
Yea it’s only life

You were always playing hard
Never could let down your guard

But you can’t win
If you never give in
To that voice within
Saying pick up your chin
Baby let go of it

Saving Jane: Supergirl

I’m the life of the party
So contagious
All the boys wanna catch me
But I’m just playin’

I’m supergirl
I’m everywhere
I’m flashing lights
They stop and stare
I’m fire red
I’m on a roll
I’m in your head and everybody knows
I’m, I’m, I’m supergirl

I’m the perfect disaster
You can’t stop me
Coming faster and faster
But you just watch me [you just watch me]

Ani DiFranco: Untouchable Face

think i’m going for a walk now
i feel a little unsteady
i don’t want nobody to follow me
‘cept maybe you
i could make you happy you know
if you weren’t already
i could do a lot of things
and i do

tell you the truth i prefer
the worst of you
too bad you had to have a better half
she’s not really my type
but i think you two are forever
and i hate to say it but
you’re perfect together

so fuck you
and your untouchable face
and fuck you
for existing in the first place
and who am i
that i should be vying for your touch
and who am i
i bet you can’t even tell me that much

Lady GaGA: Just Dance

(JUST DAAAAANNNCEY IT OUT.)

Can’t find my drink or man.
Where are my keys, I lost my phone.
What’s go-ing out on the floor?
I love this record baby, but I can’t see straight anymore.
Keep it cool what’s the name of this club?
I can’t remember but it’s alright, alright.

Just dance. Gunna be okay.
Da-doo-doo-doo
Just dance. Spin that record babe.
Da-doo-doo-doo
Just dance. Gunna be okay.
Duh-duh-duh-duh
Dance. Dance. Dance. Ju-just dance.